All Rats Day
Why are rats the only animals that have to live in the subway? We want to be up top with the birds and squirrels and ferrets. All the nice animals live above ground. We’re nice. At least as nice as squirrels. We just don’t have fluffy tails. For that we have to live underground? We carry disease you say? Well a lot of animals carry diseas - Bird Flu is expected to wipe out a few million people hopefully. I didn’t mean that.
My ancestors came over from Holland when this island used to be called New Amsterdam. Those were the days for rats. There were no subways back then. We got to stay above ground with the others. But then the bloody British took over and built subways and forced us to live down here with the trains. Okay, they didn’t actually build the subways. You caught me. But they had the idea and they passed it down to their great, great, great grandchildren who built the subways. Same thing. All I know is, if the Dutch were still here, there wouldn’t be any subways. Are there any subways in Holland? No! I think that proves my point.
We’re gonna hold a rally next Friday. We’re calling it All Rats Day and we’re gonna demand we be allowed to live above ground where we belong. We’ll meet in the park.
Comments (10)
Hey Ben! How did the rally go? You’re not really the only guy who has to live underground. I was a hunting dog, and I met lots of underground animals. I wouldn’t actually catch them, which is why I am no longer a hunting dog. Groundhogs, ground squirrels, rabbits, badgers...all of them live underground. But not in the city. I grew up in a rural area, and moved to the city when my humans adopted me. I’d rather be underground in the city, than above ground in the country. *YAWN* Boring!
Hiss.
Hissss.
Hissssssssssss
It looks like Cuddles is having a hissy fit.
Dear Ben:
We are among your most ardent supporters, Ben! We would like to join you at your Rally next Friday on All Rats’ Day! Can we change the name to Rats’ and Cats’ Day?
“Can we change the name to Rats’ and Cats’ Day?”
If they do, I’m not showing up. Sorry but I’m not.
I’m guessing Mr. Cuddles is thinking “Mmmm....All Rats Day = Buffet!”
Cats are gross, eating rats.....
Cat poo is just fine without any ‘rat additives’.
Gunner
Glad you enjoy our poo, Gunner. We’ll leave you a big portion under the 3rd palm tree from the left.