I Do Not Like Jazz
I clawed up the speaker grills and I’ll do it again if I have to. And then I’ll keep doing it until you get it through that thick skull of yours that I do not like jazz.
Would it kill you to play some U2 once in awhile? Maybe some John Hyatt? Look at your CD rack. You have at least a dozen Broadway show albums. When was the last time you put on RENT or HOW TO SUCCEED, the one starring Matthew Broderick?
You can ramble on all you want about jazz not being about the notes but rather about what’s BETWEEN the notes, how it’s more sophisticated..blah, blah, blah. Okay, I can see that at those times when you have ladies over, Miles Davis might be a better choice than the soundtrack to COMPANY. But Sunday afternoons? After she’s packed up her stuff and gone home? No. Sunday’s are the time to put on something that has an actual melody. When I’m in my litter box taking a constitutional, I don’t want complicated syncopation between a tenor sax and a piano. I want Van Halen. It’s much easier to poop to Van Halen than Miles Davis. Ask anybody.
So do we understand each other? I’m sure buying new speaker grills isn’t going to be cheap. Don’t make me ruin the new ones too.
Comments (6)
And the noise...makes my whiskers go straight up! I’m glad when they leave the music off.
Dusty, keep up the good work.We felines have to let humans know where their place is in the hierarchy. Our needs and likes always come first. The sooner they realize this, the happier they will be. I don’t like jazz either. Those long, drawn out notes hurt my tender ears and makes my teeth vibrate.
As a member of the Cat family myself, I don’t mind jazz. What annoys me is the constant drumming I’m always hearing in the distance.
A cat who doesn’t like jazz and yet jazz is where the phrase “cool cat” came from. What do you guys make of that? Traitor? That’s what I’m thinking.
Indy, I may be young but I believe the saying “cool cat” came from the beatniks in the 50’s. Besides, anything a feline does is considered “cool!” Except listening to Jazz. We can hear a mouse from 50 feet away, what do you think that jazz noise does to our brains?Keep scratching Cosmo. We stand on all 4s supporting you.
Ugh! How utterly plebian and tasteless! Who is this “Dusty”, anyhow? Evidently one of the hoi-polloi lacking the rudiments of culture! There are many of us (a selected minority,to be sure!)in the Feline Domain who enjoy nothing so much as a soothing backroll to the glorious sounds of Wagner, Beethoven, or Mozart. What can surpass the pleasure of a joyful bodyscratch to the beauty of the classics? None of this raucous, strident pop crudity for us! How gauche! Grow up,pull-ease! -Alfred Catt-